Growing pains

Building relationships in the blended family

While watching the movie “Timer” this morning I was reminded of the main theme of my blog. Blending families, blending cultures. In this little gem of a movie was a subplot where the son of a semi-wealthy Caucasian family is matched with a Hispanic girl. The Hispanic family reacted with revulsion, while the Caucasian family desired to immediately unite as a family.

This reminded me of my experience with my blended family. I was bewildered when my husband’s family members were taken aback because I am white. Racism? Really? I was not anticipating it. And yet it seems that perhaps it is a common theme.

What I am grappling with is the concept of a population that is marginalized in the U.S. being racist towards the traditionally dominant group. Why would my new boyfriend’s family dislike me because of my race? They acted welcoming, but in reality they just wanted me to go away.

Their attitude persisted and the false friendliness turned into open dislike. One male family member crossed the line at the family Christmas celebration. He actually said that even though we were together, it would only last for a little while. My husband, being the amazing man that he is, immediately stood up and we said our goodbyes. He has since terminated his relationship with that group of the family.

I find it sad that people make presumptions about others.  How can they dislike people without first attempting to get to know them?


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